Day Three: You are Braver than You Know

"Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you saying, "This is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21

I rely on that voice. My life is built on that voice. Especially in the past three and a half years, in which time I have picked up and move homes/apartments six times.

I NEVER pictured myself as the person that moves across the country and back and then two hours from home. NEVER. EVER.

Annie discusses her move to Nashville in 2007 in this chapter... and as this is my third time reading, this is always the one where I go "alright, I'm in, she's got me."

My move to Washington State in 2017 was the most terrifying and gut-wrenching move of my life.

There's one quote that I highlighted and I always come back to:

"I won't bore you with stories of the weeping and gnashing of teeth that occured for the first weeks (okay, fine, months) after I moved but it was terrible. Painful. Lonely."

So yeah, that was me to a "T." Except in the age of social media and "look at how great my life is," I posted otherwise.

I posted pics of my first on-air appearance as a sportscaster. I posted my first trip to Seattle. I made people believe I was right where I was supposed to be.

Yet I was dying inside.

My first day on the job, I shadowed my sports director who was hosting a hockey show at a local restaraunt for our sports network. At one point I excused myself into the bathroom. Put my hands on the sink and looked at my tear-stained cheeks, blood-stained eyes and thought "what have I done?"

Journal prompt: Think back on your life. Journal about two or three moments you or someone else might label as "brave."

There's no real shortage of courageous and brave moments throughout my adult life. Moving, starting a job where I made 11 dollars an hour and lived with a stranger. There have actually been times where I have pleaded to God, "hey I need a BREAK from the BRAVE. I am NOT cut out for this."

But I was. And I am. I don't feel brave MOST of the time. That year and a half was the most life-changing of my entire existence. I grew as a sportscaster. I made friendships I didn't know were possible. I got my heart broken and picked myself back up off the floor. I made it through.

Because I relied on the voice behind me saying "keep. going."

I am journaling about my "100 Days to Brave" journey by Annie F. Downs. Grab a copy of the book and read along with me!